Main Characters: Coco & me, Laura (8), Katherine (7), Rob (4), Sophie (9 mos)
Approximate Date: May 1992
Introduction. Several days before, Coco had gone to something and gotten back about 9:00 pm. When she got home, I had all the kids together in Laura’s room and was telling them stories. Coco gave me quite a lecture for this. She pointed out that the next day I would leave home and go to work, and she would be stuck with a bunch of cranky kids. This would be all my fault for letting them stay up past their bedtime and that doggone it I ought to have the kids bathed, teeth brushed, and in bed by 8:30. I needed to be on her team, and I agreed that we will always work together as a team to get this done.
I consulted with Laura and Katherine as to what they should get Coco for Mother’s Day. And they agreed that we should buy Coco a wallet that was large enough to fit her oversized checkbook inside it. We ended up making two separate attempts to find and buy such a wallet.
The first outing was to Wilsons and did not work out. Had to do with me not realizing you had to pull a ticket number to get served. Urrrg!!
The next night we made our second attempt. Coco left at 6:30 to go to a PTA meeting and the children and I went to Walmart. When we got there, I put Sophie in a buggy. Rob wanted to ride with her. Fine. Laura insisted on pushing them. Fine. Rob didn’t like the way Laura pushed them because when she would stop, she would stop too quickly, and he would fall down. (Rob likes to stand up in buggies.) Rob started complaining that Laura was being mean to him. When I finished dealing with that, I looked around and realized Katherine had disappeared and the four of us went looking for her. After 10 minutes, I went to the desk clerk to have her announce Katherine’s name on the pa when we found her. Then we went over to the wallets.
Well, they had three different wallet sections: The cheapies, the standards, and the expensive ones. Cost was not a factor. I just wanted to get a wallet that worked and get home as quickly as possible. I hadn’t thought to bring Coco’s checkbook with me, but I knew in my mind what I wanted. I did my best to explain what we needed to the kids. Meanwhile, Sophie had gotten a little fussy, so I had Laura, Rob and Katherine go search the three different racks and bring me prospective wallets for me to inspect. “I like this one Daddy, will it work?” “No, go put it back where you found it.” After about thirty minutes I looked up and we had wallets all over. There must have had been a hundred wallets out on the floor in the aisles. Among them was one that I thought might work. We then spent 10 minutes or so putting all the wallets back on racks as best as we could. (I don’t know how Walmart ever got them straight again.)
On our way to check out, both Rob and Laura wanted to push Sophie and they got into a big screaming fight. You could have heard them all the way across Walmart. I said, “Rob! Let Laura do it!” So, Laura took the buggy and we headed for the check out. It seems Rob decided to get us back and walked off. I looked back and I couldn’t find him. Then, all of the sudden I hear Rob balling at the top of his lungs. I whirled around one of the aisles and there was Rob standing there just screaming at the top of his lungs and he was saying. “He left me! My Daddy left me!” So, I picked Rob up and told him that I was sorry for leaving him and we all went to the checkout lines.
The checkout lines were all very long and the kids were getting edgy. We could not afford any more mishaps, so I made a command decision to keep them contained. I said, “Look, you’ll can get something just for yourself. It can’t cost too much.” They surveyed the offerings, and each picked a little prize. Rob got a spider with candy stuffed in it, Laura got an RT Blast, and Katherine had some type of a certs. Anyway, they each had their little thing that they wanted to get, and they seemed content.
Now time was becoming a factor. I started going from line to line trying to find one that worked. When I looked at my watch it was 8:05. It didn’t matter which line we got in, they had to stop because somebody had to do a check, or some MasterCard didn’t work, or they spilled something on the counter. So, we would go to another line, and it was like a bad dream where you’re running, and you can’t get anywhere. I realized that the “buffoon shift” was on duty at Walmart. Well, the next thing I knew it was 8:20 and it still looked like it would be at least 10 minutes until we could get checked out. We were out of time; we had to go. I said, “Children we are going to have to leave now. We cannot buy Mama’s wallet, but I will come back tomorrow, and I will get it.” So, they say, “Okay Daddy that’s fine.” I got Sophie and wheeled her around in the shopping cart and was heading out the door when I looked back, and the three kids were all standing there in line very patiently. I said, “Children, we have to go now!” And they all looked at me like I was crazy. “Like I said, I can’t get Mama’s wallet because we don’t have time.” And Rob said, “That’s okay Daddy but we got to get our candy.” “No! We can’t buy anything because we can’t get through the damn line.” And Laura looked at me with this look that would kill, and she says, “Daddy you promised us that we could have candy.” And I said, “Laura I know I did, and I meant it when I said it but we don’t have time to go through the line. You are going to have to put your candy back.” Rob clenched his fist as tight as he could around his spider and he started building up. I could just see a full scream was about to be unleashed. I ran over, and said, “Rob, tomorrow first thing, I will come here, and get all of your candy. When you get home, it will be waiting for you on the dining room table.” Then with Rob whimpering, but at least not wailing at the top of his lungs, we went home.
COCO – He let me down again.
When I got home, it was after 8:30 and no one was home. I was not pleased. We had had the discussion the night before and David had agreed, “You are right, I’ll work as a team. We’ll get them in bed by 8:30 at the latest.” So here it was 8:45 and not only were their teeth not brushed, nor their pj’s on, they weren’t even in the house. I didn’t even know where they were. They finally pulled in the driveway just about 8:50.
DAVID still trying.
The Walmart wallet did not work. And I now realized that it was not nearly enough to appease Coco. So, I went out to the Mall (by myself) and I had so many things to do. But I went out to the Mall at 2:30 and I went to all these different places and finally at JC Penney’s I found one that if you really squeezed it, it would work. So, I bought it. Then I ran over to Goudcheaux and got a pepper grinder for Rob to give as an extra Mother’s Day present. I also bought a saltshaker and pepper coins so that Laura and Katherine would have something extra as well. I also got M Day cards for them to give Coco. So, I got all these things and then went back to my office to finish up work that had to be done. From my perspective, I had done more than enough for M Day.
COCO. Unaware
I was not aware of all the work that David had gone through. He had not shared any of this with. I was not aware of how hard he had worked for my Mother’s Day gifts. So, I was really irked with him for breaking his promise to get the kids in bed by 8:30 pm.
DAVID. Wrap up. (not from the dictation) It actually got much worse after that – had to do with me deciding to reward myself with a little fishing trip to Valhalla on Mother’s Day since I had done so much to see that the kids were attentive to their mother on Mother’s Day.
Clearly, Coco’s father set up an expectation that I simply could not meet without violating everything I had been taught by my father. It was a major train wreck. But we persevered and survived. Halleluiah. Come May 2022, we will have been married 44 years and celebrated the same number of Mother’s Days together. We have made it – but it took a lot of hard work, prayer and wise counseling.